Happy Krampus...

Today would be the day when you´d hear distant cow bells clanging outside as soon as dark sets in, and in case you´ve hired a crampus to terrify your little ones, mixed with guttural roars seemingly coming directly from hell, when this feral chap rampages in front of your home. Today you will hear nothing at all, because something more terrifying has taken Krampus´s place. I won´t say that I miss this hellish fellow the way he presents himself nowadays, because these last two decades have turned Krampus into some sort of herd animal, his kind mostly emerging in large groups, to provide amusement to spectators who pay for the appearence of the hellish gang while drinking spiced wine. Too much of spiced wine, to be earnest, with spontaneous fraternification or occasional brawls ensuing. That´s why the shaggy fellow got banned from the streets in the year of corona. I remember the butterflies in my stomach on the fifth of December, when I went home from school in the evening, lessons having ended when it was already dark outside. Would I meet one of the feared creatures? I remember one Krampus day, I was thirteen years and almost home, about half a kilometre to run- and run I did- when a Krampus jumped out from behind one of the tall horse chestnut trees in the alley. I began to run really fast, he did, too. In front of our house we both stopped, me wheezing, Krampus laughing, and hard at that. "I really think you should buy yourself a bra!" Krampus said. In my haste to get home from school I had not yet buttoned my coat, which gave a good view of my heaving chest. Krampus was the boy next door, two years older than me and so much more interested in things like bras, or rather what was beneath it. I gave him a good bashing, even though he was taller than me, and next day I bought myself a bra, to the dismay of my mum, who apparently thought that her girl would stay a girl for ever. No, I do not miss the Krampus, except when he visits with Saint Nicholas, who is the only one to tame this hellish fellow. But he is one of the many customs in our country that slowly, but surely will disappear, and Covid19 does its bit to speed the process, that´s the worst part about it.